Church over family

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Contents

Criticism

Critics charge that the Church teaches them to put service in the Church (e.g. in Church callings) over the needs of their families.

Source(s) of the Criticism

  • Search for the Truth DVD (2007) Resources
  • Bob McCue, “Big Picture Analysis of Mormonism—And When Should We Speak Out?” 27 Oct 2004 13h48 (web-posting).

Response

Warned Harold B. Lee:

We have had shocking examples of Church leaders in some stakes and wards who have seemingly used their business and Church assignments as excuses for neglecting their families. In one case I heard a wife say, "Because he was so much away in his business and his Church responsibilities, I was just little more than a hired woman in his house." I have frequently counseled, and I repeat it to you again, to all of you here: "The most important of the Lord's work you will ever do will be within the walls of your own homes." We must never forget that.[1]

Said President Gordon B. Hinckley to bishops:

I know that the work is hard at times. There are never enough hours to get it done. The calls are numerous and frequent. You have other things to do. That is true. You must not rob your employer of the time and energy that are rightfully his. You must not rob your family of time which belongs to them. But as most of you have come to know, as you seek for divine guidance, you are blessed with wisdom beyond your own and strength and capacity you did not know you had. It is possible to budget your time so that you neglect neither your employer, your family, nor your flock… We do not expect the impossible from you. We ask that you do the very best you can. Delegate to others every aspect of the work that you legitimately can. And then leave matters in the hands of the Lord.(emphasis added)[2]

Note that family is emphatically not to be neglected or “impoverished,” and that one is not expected to do more than is healthy for the family.

Church leaders have consistently taught that family duties are the primary Church duties. To neglect one's family needs is to fail in the most important Church assignment:

  • “Your responsibility as a father and a husband transcends any other interest in life.” [3]
  • "A man who holds the priesthood regards the family as ordained of God. Your leadership of the family is your most important and sacred responsibility. The family is the most important unit in time and in eternity and, as such, transcends every other interest in life."[4]
  • “No other success can compensate for failure in the home.” [5]
  • “I have repeatedly said to our priesthood leaders that the most important of the Lord’s work you will ever do will be within the walls of your own home.” [6]
  • "If you will make your first concern the comfort, the well-being, and the happiness of your companion, sublimating any personal concern to that loftier goal, you will be happy…"[7]

Conclusion

Church doctrine places the family at the center of one's life. In cases of conflict, family needs take precedence over Church responsibilies.

Endnotes

  1. [back]  Harold B. Lee, Teachings of Harold B. Lee (Salt Lake City, Utah: Bookcraft, 1996}, 258. ISBN 1570082340. (subscript. required) GospeLink
  2. [back]  Gordon B. Hinckley, "The Shepherds of Israel," Ensign (November 2003): 60. off-site
  3. [back]  Boyd K. Packer, "The Father and the Family," Ensign (May 1994): 19. off-site
  4. [back]  Howard W. Hunter, "Being a Righteous Husband and Father," Ensign (November 1994): 49. off-site
  5. [back]  David O. McKay, Conference Report (April 1964): 5. (quoting: J.E. McCulloch, Home: The Savior of Civilization (1924), 42.)
  6. [back]  Harold B. Lee, "Maintain Your Place As a Woman," Ensign (February 1972): 48. off-site
  7. [back]  Gordon B. Hinckley, Brigham Young University commencement exercises, Provo, Utah, 27 April 1995, cited in Liahona (Apr. 1996): 10.

Further reading

FAIR wiki articles

Mormon culture and attitudes wiki articles

FAIR web site

Mormon culture and attitudes FAIR articles
  • FAIR Topical Guide: Marriage and sexuality FAIR link
  • Scott Gordon, "Education, Scholarship, and Mormonism," FAIR. FAIR link

External links

Mormon culture and attitudes on-line articles
  • "Mormons, education, and intellect," Adventures in Mormonism blog (6 May 2007). off-site
  • Terrell H. Bell, "Educational Attainment," Encyclopedia of Mormonism, 4 vols., edited by Daniel H. Ludlow, (New York, Macmillan Publishing, 1992), 1:446–447. off-site off-site PDF link direct off-site
  • Cherry B. Silver, "Mormon Culture: A Worldview, review of People of Paradox: A History of Mormon Culture, by Terryl L. Givens," FARMS Review 20/1 (2008): 73–94. off-site PDF link wiki
  • "The Dimensions of Mormon Religiosity," Sunstone Symposium mp3 offsite

Printed material

Mormon culture and attitudes printed works
  • Stan L. Albrecht, Tim B. Heaton, "Secularization, Higher Education, and Religiosity," Review of Religious Research 26/1, Special Issue Co-Sponsored by the Society for the Sociological Study of Mormon Life and the Family and Demographic Institute of Brigham Young University (September 1984): 437–58. off-site
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